Habits We Train Are Habits We Gain

Do you forage for food when you’re bored? Do you channel surf before you go to bed? Do you bite your nails when you’re worried? You may not even realize what you do when you are doing it. Habits are ingrained, repetitive to the point we’ve put our lives on autopilot. Worried? Stressed? Anxious? Have no fear, your subconscious mind will take over. It knows what to do. After all, you’ve been programming it for years with your habits.

When 2012 rolled around, I decided to break a few bad habits and replace them with healthier habits. Instead of waking up and going straight to my computer, I roll out my yoga mat instead. I practice yoga every morning for at least 30 minutes. Email, Facebook, Twitter, and Words With Friends can wait. After 30+ days into my new habit, I’ve discovered that my mornings are starting off better.  I’m not wrapped up in the lives of other people – instead I’m returning to the more flexible, calmer me.

I also stopped drinking coffee. Yes, I did. I quit cold turkey. Headaches be damned. After 30+ days of no java, I can honestly tell you that I no longer have that 2PM slump. And no, I did not replace coffee with Red Bull or a 5 Hour Energy Drink (I tried it once and broke out with hives. My eyelids and throat swelled up. No thank you.) Instead, I replaced my coffee habit with a morning protein shake mixed with fresh fruit, almond milk, and ice cubes. What’s the by-product of drinking a healthier breakfast?  I’ve lost 4 ½” off my waist, 3” off my hips, and 6 lbs. from my body.

I am now on my next 30 days and with my morning yoga practice and protein shake habits taking hold, I’m ready to change another habit. I feel like I’m over-connected in the not so real world of social networking. I’ve already deleted myself from three online groups that I gravitate towards when I’m distracted or bored. In fact, I’ve piddle-farted days of time away engaging in conversations with people I don’t even know. I’d rather spend that time doing something meaningful and productive, like writing. Or better yet, I’d rather spend that time in face-to-face conversations with people I know in real life.

I’m not trying to change everything at once and I’m not telling you what you should or should not change in your life. However, when something is clearly no longer working in our lives or is not useful or adding value, why do we insist on doing it as if it mattered? When I told my friends I quit drinking coffee, the most common response I got was “Oh, I can’t give up my coffee.”

The truth is, yes you can. You can quit a bad habit. It’s a choice. But to make the quitting successful, you need to replace it with something better – something that adds value or is useful to your life. Replacing coffee with a nutritious protein shake was useful for me. Rolling out my yoga mat and practicing yoga for 30 minutes every single morning adds more value to my life than checking email because yoga sets a better tone for my day than email ever did.

How can you change habits that no longer serve you?

1. Make a list of your daily habits. Do not label them good or bad, just make a list of them.
2. After each habit, write down how this habit helps you, serves you, or adds value.
3. If the habit no longer helps you, serves you, or adds value, write down what new habit you’d like to replace it with.
4. Pick one habit you want to change and its replacement habit. For the next 30 days, continue to replace the new habit for the old one.  If for any reason you revert back to the old habit, start again from day 1. Remember, it takes 30 consecutive days to form a new habit.
5. After your first 30 days, notice how you feel. Do you feel your new habit has made something in your life better?
6. Pick the next bad habit you want to change. Repeat steps 4-6. Do this for 12 months and you will have changed 12 bad habits into 12 better habits.  These 12 better habits will become part of your happier and healthier lifestyle.

As you decide to train new habits, you may want to find an accountability partner. Someone you can count on to hold you accountable.  You may also want to write affirmation statements about your new habit and post them in places you’re most likely to see them, like the refrigerator or bathroom mirror. A good friend of mine posts sticky notes all over her home to help keep her on track with the small changes she’s making in her life.  I like the one she has on her front door, “determination.”

Remember, habits we train are habits we gain. What habits are you training?

I’d love to hear back from you. If you’d like to share your success stories, please share them in the comments. If you’d like help making your list or accountability help, please feel free to connect with me.

Peggy Nolan

Peggy Nolan writes frequently on topics of self-growth and personal development. A published writer, Peggy's articles have appeared in MORE Online, Yahoo!, Ladies Home Journal Online, Apsire, and she's a regular contributor for StepMom Magazine. She is the creator of the popular resource website and radio show, The Stepmom's Toolbox. Peggy's poems and interpretations of her own life appear on her blog, Serendipity Smiles. When Peggy's not writing you can find her on her yoga mat, in the dojo practicing Muay Thai Kickboxing or training for her 8 day 2012 West Coast Trail hike. Peggy lives in Derry, NH with her husband, Richard, and Edgar the Wonder Dog.

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